BLEEDING LOVE

Have you guys fallen in love? Do you come to a point that you almost lose your sanity just because of loving so much?

Last week, September 14, 2011, Shiela Macapugay shot his husband and accidentally killed an innocent guard of a famous Quezon City Mall. According to news, Shiela confronted her husband publicly and shot her husband inside the mall and planned to kill herself after, but she failed shooting herself when the guard Ricardo Inamac intercepted which resulted to Inamac’s death.

“I said to myself, before I die, I have to kill my husband first. I just couldn’t accept the fact that he abandoned us for his mistress.”

Days later, a thirteen year old boy shot his alleged 17- year old boyfriend before firing the .22caliber to himself in front of a restaurant chain inside a famous mall in Pampanga out of jealousy. Both were rushed to the hospital, one was declared brain dead and the other one in a critical condition.

Amidst all this, I can’t think of anyone to blame for the circumstances that happened leading them to this. The only thing I’m certain is LOVE. We cannot blame Shiela for killing his husband; we cannot blame him for taking the life of an innocent guard because we were not there when it happened. We do not know what exactly is going on with her emotion during that time when all she wanted was to escape from the reality of being hurt, ridiculed and cheated by her husband. On the other hand, we cannot blame Abel for choosing his mistress over Shiela because we do not know exactly the reason of Abel’s infidelity. We also cannot judge the 13 year old boy who love his partner so much resulting into a tragic end of their love affair.

I don’t know what in the world is happening today. God save us from another tragedy. 

ALMOST

Okay, another boring day in the office that leads me to listening to songs available in my iTouch. I listened to a lot of different genre so I have Pop/rock, Alternative, R&B and acoustic songs in my iTouch. I decided to play r&b songs this time, all because I’m into a weird feeling of missing someone right now.

A few months back, I’ve been dating a guy whom I feel a little into. I like him and I wouldn’t deny the fact that I feel happy knowing him. It brought me to life once more, and gave me another chance of opening my heart again. I am a single mother, and as a single parent, I have many responsibilities and priorities in life. I will be very honest, I’m afraid loving someone again, trusting my heart and become broken. It’s not that I completely gave up on love but I promised myself not to be in a relationship without fixing my broken heart. He was one of the perfect guys out there to begin with. He loves my son like his own, and visits my family asking if they will allow him to court me. He also finds time to bond with my friends and never missed a single opportunity of making me special. 

Lately, things did not get used to what I’ve been wishing and praying for. Although, we still constantly chat, I know this will no longer be a soon to be “serious relationship”. Its looks like he gave up on me already, because he’s having a hard time dealing with me.

 So I can relate to this song right now:

"Almost"

[Verse 1]
Can you tell me
How can one miss what she's never had
How could I reminisce when there is no past
How could I have memories of being happy with you boy
Could someone tell me how can this be
How could my mind pull up incidents
Recall dates and times that never happened
How could we celebrate a love that's to late
And how could I really mean the words I'm bout to say

[Chorus]
I missed the times that we almost shared
I miss the love that was almost there
I miss the times that we use to kiss
At least in my dreams
Just let me take my time and reminisce
I miss the times that we never had
What happened to us we were almost there
Whoever said it's impossible to miss when you never had
Never almost had you

[Verse 2]
I cannot believe I let you go
Or what I should say I should've grabbed you up and never let you go
I should've went out with you
I should've made you my boo boy
Yes that's one time I should've broke the rules
I should've went on a date
Should've found a way to escape
Should've turned a almost into
If it happened now its to late
How could I celebrate a love that wasn't real
And if it didn't happen why does my heart feel

[Chorus]
I missed the times that we almost shared
I miss the love that was almost there
I miss the times that we use to kiss
At least in my dreams
Just let me take my time and reminisce
I miss the times that we never had
What happened to us we were almost there
Whoever said it's impossible to miss when you never had
Never almost had you

[Verse 3]
(sometimes I wanna rub ya, some nights I wanna hug ya)
And you seem to be the perfect one for me
You (some nights I wanna touch ya but tonight I wanna love ya)
You're all that I ever wanted
And you're my everything yes its true
Boy its hard to be close to you
My love
I know it may sound crazy
But I'm in love with you

[Chorus]
I missed the times that we almost shared
I miss the love that was almost there
I miss the times that we use to kiss
At least in my dreams
Just let me take my time and reminisce
I miss the times that we never had
What happened to us we were almost there
Whoever said it's impossible to miss when you never had
Never almost had you

I missed the times that we almost shared
I miss the love that was almost there (sometimes I wanna rub ya)
I miss the times that we use to kiss
At least in my dreams
Just let me take my time and reminisce (but tonight I wanna love ya)
I miss the times that we never had
What happened to us we were almost there
Whoever said its impossible to miss when you never had
Never, never almost had you (but tonight I wanna love ya) 

Monday Madness

from google

Tonight is the start of Monday madness in the office. I work night shift for the longest of years and been used to sleeping late in the morning, drinking beer in the morning and saying good morning to people even if it’s literally evening in our location.

I don’t really have something in my mind right now, but when I saw this “boss” I knew I have something to write about.

He was from US and a lot of pioneer agents from here know him. His attitude, the way he works, the way he see things and the way he bring people into a chaos.

I hate this guy; I hate his face, his body and him as a person. He is so pathetic, ill mannered and a childish human being who pretends to be one of the educated, professional human being in the office. Hey man! You’re not from here! So stop treating us, as if you own the place. (I wanted to tell this to him.) Everybody seems to honor him, obey him, and love him all for the love of power. Here, if you belong to his group you’re considered one of the untouchables. Untouchables are the society he grouped together to serve him, and gave him information he may need to know, whether office related, or personal information.

Hey, did I just say personal information? Yes, this man loves invading your privacy and creating issues which leads to broken relationships, friends having issues about trust and feeling disappointment and lack of motivation towards your job because of unfair treatment.

Whenever he’s here in the office, it’s like everyone hates their job. It’s like everyone has their fair share of issues and if you’re lucky you become the “hot item”. I once experienced this but I never wanted this whole thing affect me! After all, I came here for work and not to gossip. Now, all I wanted is to have a different boss (he was actually not my boss) but since, he works for the US accounts, he do the trainings for all of US HR agents.

They have a new hot item in the office, and I kinda wish her the courage to battle all of this Sh*t. I hope, she can handle all of the nasty comments, the unfair promotion, the bullying untouchables and this hard headed guy whose really a pain in the friggin’ a**.

I also wish the management of our office find this real soon. But of course, nobody will tell the managers, because they are afraid of losing their job. Of course, who’s not afraid? But, I did try once, I tried talking to my manager with all this but, it did not materialize. Because, all he can say is to let go of the Bad Vibes, they will eventually get a new issue and the topic about you will just die a natural death. True enough it did, but the pain, the friendship being in question, the hopeless wish to step up did not materialize to. = (Sadly, this continues everyday and I suck for tolerating this. 

Welcome anonymosity!

Welcome to my second attempt of BLOGGING ANONYMOUSLY.:p 

WHY ANONYMOUSLY BLOG?

My experiences are something I really want to share, but I want to make it a little private by keeping my identity anonymous because I don’t want them to know it’s me. Although I have an active blogspot account and a wordpress account. I decided to try blogging anonymously to see how this is going to be patronized by the readers.

WHAT GIVES YOU AN IDEA OF BLOGGING ANONYMOUSLY?

I was given the idea of writing a blog anonymously because it’s more of an experiment to know if people will still going to believe you despite of not revealing your identity. Also, I believe that it’s not the person that makes the blog interesting it’s about the experiences, the lesson and the passion to write. And not to mention blogging anonymously is one of my bucket lists.

DESCRIBE YOURSELF?

I am a mother, a fighter, a comedienne, a loving daughter, a friend, a bitch, a traveler, a fashionista, a stupid girl, a bratinella, a believer of God and anything I can be without trying so hard.

WHAT AM I GOING TO WRITE?

This is going to be all about my experiences, good finds, travels, politics, work, and anything under the sun.

WHO CAN READ?

Anybody, any invertebrates or vertebrates who can read, appreciate, hate, love and whatever! Enjoy!