Seasons of Love....my seasonal sadness.

Alright, February is truly the seasons of love…although I’m not into a relationship right now, I still wanted to think and maybe believe that Valentine’s Day isn’t just for couples but also for people who still believe that LOVE is still the next best thing on earth, single, loveless or in a relationship, married or divorce or whatever. (You may agree or disagree)

I’ve been thinking lately about what could’ve been, if my love story was written a different way. Or if only I didn’t rush into everything, maybe I am married by now, or in a relationship with my soon to be husband. But with all these craziness running into my head, I want to believe that my destiny is already written, right before it happened....but of course it's not yet the end.

I have to say that until now, I regret the times; I didn’t listen to my parents. I didn’t listen to my friends and if I did, maybe it turned out to be a different story. But then again, I am thankful, because God gave me a special gift, who will love me unconditionally and the one person who would always made me feel love and special…and that is my Son.

But I can’t help having this sudden attack of what I call the seasonal sadness; sorry because I’m so emotional like that, and I can’t help being lonely whenever, someone significant/close to me is getting married, anything about being in a relationship is like a panic button to my emotional heart. (I am not bitter; please don’t tell me I am) I just can’t help feeling this because of my son…and OK being pressured because I am waiting for 28 gazillion years to be married.(since I was born...haha exxage)

My son is just two years old and still has a lot of growing up to do. And each day, I fear of my son’s future question. I fear of telling him how the love story of me and his father turned out to be the nightmare I never wanted to remember. I fear everyday of several questions popping into my head and the answer I am afraid to give. And of course, I wouldn’t deny the fact that I would love to walk in an aisle with my future husband, and to be in love over and over again. I would like to think that my love story has not ended yet, because God really takes time creating the beautiful things…and for sure..My moment will surely come and will worth the wait.

They say that it takes one stupid person to fall in love, and one stupid person to make it work.- chos..

And just before posting this to my blog, a friend of mine message me… (I colored my name black and violet for my friend..for privacy)

Don’t you worry Paw (that’s how we call each other) you will be the first person next to my mom to know pag may nabiktima na ako LOL.  =)

Back after a month long Hiatus.

I feel like I owe everyone a little bit of an explanation, on why this blog has been in a month long Hiatus. Let me share what’s been happening to my life lately.

The last week of December is the most stressful week I ever encountered for the last 27yrs of my life. Yes, that’s how exaggerated it was. We were almost going live with our second project until the client says no to us. The data migration and the parallel phase were suddenly cut when we were almost at the verge of saying woohoo to this project. And because of this we need to rework everything and go back to user acceptance testing part.

The first week of January is supposedly the birth of my 365 days blog project but due to my “hectic” schedule, I have to pass on this. I feel so sorry for myself, because I feel like a loser. A loser because, my project didn’t push through on its original live date, plus I suck updating my blog, and the fact that I cannot even spend time with my son, family and friends.

With all this stress, and the pressure, I was diagnosed with an unhealthy heart. I have to give up living unhealthy by eating delicious foods, drinking after work, smoking, stress and a lot more. It’s hard when you know your stress at work, and at the same time sick.

Hopefully, everything will work out fine, I’m starting living healthy by doing cardio exercises, and eating less than usual. Mostly greens and fruits is the majority food inside my fridge. Although, the stress with work, will never go away until we go live on March, I am still praying that everything will be back to normal, if not now….soon.

Ps. I am starting to think of turning the 365days project into 12mos project by putting the significant pictures I had every month. I’m hoping that I can do the update every month. Also, I will be deleting the website and will try to update you every once in awhile. Be healthy everyone. Miss you all. 

Typhoon Sendong Wrath

Photo courtesy of inquirer.net

The recent tax deduction made me so mad upon realizing how devastating my Christmas and New year would be. So I spent almost 3 days of tweeting hoping that the #cashbadlyneeded hashtag will be trending to at least let our company know that we almost want to burn the office particularly finance department to tell them how inconvenient it was on our part.

Anyway, the reason why I’m writing this blog is not to discuss about my tax, but it came to my realization yesterday that I am still lucky despite of the Tax impact on my salary this period. Why? Because of the wrath Sendong left last Thursday. The number of people who died in this calamity is almost 600 and counting, and thinking how Christmas will be spent by their families is truly depressing. Watching the news, really made me feel guilty of complaining, about how my Christmas and New Year would be since I have my whole family to celebrate it with.

Maybe, I suck handling my finances, that if only I assumed the implication of last month’s low tax deduction then I should have handled it differently. I feel saddened for the victims of Sendong, I’m sorry Jesus for being so selfish. Starting today, I will avoid complaining about the traffic, I will avoid complaining why I am fat, I will avoid every little complain about anything on earth that has impact on me,  and most of all, I should be thankful of everything I have on my plate. After all, Christmas is not about being rich, not about having extravagant celebration but it is rather the time to celebrate the day when Christ was born and the day to celebrate it with your family.

PS: For those of you who are wondering how they can extend their help with the victims of Sendong. You can donate as low as 5.00php just by texting through Philippine Red Cross.

Here’s how:

For Globe subscribers:
via SMS, c/o Red Cross – text RED <amount> and send to 2899 – valid donation amounts are P5, 25, 50, 100, 300, 500 and 1000 (For ex, RED 10). Transaction is free.
via GCASH, text DONATE<space><amount><space><MPIN><space><REDCROSS> and send to 2882

For Smart subscribers:
via SMS, c/o Red Cross – text RED <amount> and send to 4143 – valid donation amounts are P10, 25, 50, 100, 300, 500, 1000 (For ex, RED 10). 

You can also donate via Paypal or Credit card here: http://www.redcross.org.ph/donatenow

Let’s all not forget the meaning of Christmas. Be safe everyone.

Amen,

Lala

COMING SOON

I am so excited for the new year to come. Of course Xmas too...but what's making me more excited is the birth of my website on Jan 01,2012  www.wix.com/chuchurnaeklabu/365daysprojectoflala

I'll keep you posted.=)

Enjoy!

Lala

BC Bloggers=I'm now a member!

I came across the blog of Ms. Paula who founded BC Bloggers Secret. It's interesting to know that there's a fastest way to connect to other bloggers without the hassle of commenting to each post, putting your link and begging to be followed back. Kudos to Ms. Paula for having this idea.

To know more visit this.

Jack of all trades, Master of none

photo courtesy of http://dorrys.com/jack-of-all-trades/

Have you ever considered yourself a person that is competent with many skills, but cannot be considered the OUTSTANDING in any particular skills your good at? I think I can consider myself as one or maybe not.

My boss recently told me, “Lala, you are really such an exceptional employee. When I told you to finish everything, you meet the deadlines, you’re also good using your common sense and that’s one thing I admire you best. But (OMG there’s a big BUT?)  You lack specialization; you’re more of a generalist than becoming the best. I am grooming you to become the best so I hope you can improve that part of you. All in all you’re GOOD. “

I don’t know but it seems to me that he wanted to reiterate that I’m a “Jack of all trades but a master of none.” Haha or I’m just being so judgmental. On the contrary, I really don’t want to assume its negative, because everyone is entitled to their opinion. My opinion regarding this is that a specialist imprisons himself in one dimension, making him stagnant.  While a generalist, finds his way to improve more, learning new things, and enjoy the process of pursuing excellence.

So if someone told you, you are indeed a Jack of all trades, master of none, it doesn’t always mean negative. But if you think I maybe wrong….I tell you...this is my blog so I’m right. LOL

Boredom Strikes

I seriously have no idea why am i writing this shit right now..I think I;m having a bad day. I'm happy though because a lot of interesting and fun things are going on in my life ....but I guess boredom strikes now.Well let's define boredom...boredom is not, contrary to popular belief, a result of having nothing to do. It's very hard to come up with a situation where a person's options are so limited that he or she can literally do nothing. It stems from the situation where none of the possible things taht a person can do realistically appeal to the person in question. This renders the person inaactive, and generally unhappy. DAMN THIS DAY REALLY MAKES ME FEEL SO BORED!!!